I wonder...

I often wonder why I am the way I am. I mean, why do I care so much? Why can't I just observe the world for what it is and live with it? Why must my emotions barge their way itno my life and force my mind to listen as they find problems with everything?

I wish I knew. I really do. But I also wish that I knew I wasn't the only one. I mean, all my friends are totally perfect. Alright, that's a lie, but they don't seem nearly as troubled as I do.

I know for a fact that I'm not the only one who is noticing the devestation all over the world. But you know what the worst part is? I'm a total hypocrite. I look at the world and say "Why isn't anyone DOING anything?" I sit and internally cry for the world, but it doesn't do a thing. Then I read an article about how somebody did something for the community, for New Orleans, for Iraq, and I scream at myself. I say "YOU should be the one helping! You always say you care, but if you really did, you would do something other than type stupid blogs on the internet. You would be doing something!"

I rationalize, sure. I tell myself that at the age of 13, there is practically nothing I can do. Which is partially true. But, I don't know, there has to be something I can do. I just have to find what it is.