Last week I got all my shopping done and it was all pretty easy and fun. Especially because I went with my friends. If it had just been me in the mall...eh, not fun at all.

This was the strangest Christmas yet. It just didn't feel like Christmas. Maybe it's because we didn't have a proper tree. We recently got a new floor installed and didn't have time or space to buy a Christmas tree.

I'm quite merry indeed to announce I recieved my digital camera. I'm so ecstatic that I cannot correctly convey my feelings in a blog, so I frankly won't even try.

I feel really distracted right here. Because of the new flooring that was installed, we had to move the computer in my parent's room. Which is fine normally, but right now my mom and little brother are watching The Empire Strikes Back. (A classic Christmas movie, eh?) Many Star Wars buffs claim it's the best one. I have to say, it is pretty interesting, being that it's distracting me so unbelievably well.

I was making a mental list early today about what it write in my blogs. Of course, at this late hour, I hardly remember all of them, but here are a few.

• Tolerance. This expands over a lot, such as my view, tolerance vs. political correctiveness, when tolerance goes too far, and the difference of tolerance and promotion. This might eventually become something of a mini-series because I suppose I might have far too much to say for only one blog.
• When my grandmother indirectly accused me of being anorexic. It's a large story and I've long forgiven her, being that I can understand how she might think that. I'm not, thank God, and the truth is, she just cares. Maybe a little too much, but hey, it's a better fault than others.
• The recent happenings of my life. Hey, isn't it what blogs are for?
• I think I might start adding a few dreams. If it starts becoming a large habit, I might start a dream blog.

Speaking of new things I might be doing, I often have to backtrack when I'm writing blogs because they simply have become too large and indirect. I go off on bunny trails far too much. So I was thinking, since the bunny trails are included in the way I think, maybe I should put asterisks and put my bunny trails at the bottom. What do you think?

It's late and my parent's wish to sleep now. I probably won't be sleeping for a while, I wish to finish a book I've been reading called The Haunting of Alaizabel Cray. (Written by Chris Wooding.) It's very interesting and extremely well written. If you get the chance, read it.

Good night.

Wow, it's finally winter break.

I slept in until 9am today, which probably doesn't seem too late, especially considering that 90% of my peers slept until 2pm. However, it is late to me because I usually am physically awake at 6am -ish and mentally awake around 6:45.

I have slight homework over break, but not even as much as a normal weekend. My happiness knows no bounds.

There is a wee problem though.

There are eight days until Christmas and I haven't bought any of my family members their presents. I don't even know what to buy most of them.

I tried to flat out ask them, but most of them wouldn't answer or answered "Happy Kids." Darling, you better be serious, because if you actually want that, that's all your getting.

Giving is a pain. So is receiving. Most of the time I don't want a gift. This year all I really want is a digital camera. Expensive, I'm quite aware. But in all truth, one gift I actually want is much better than a load of gifts I don't care for. And it costs about the same anyway.

Whoever said that Christmas time was the happiest time of year was seriously off their rocker.

Speaking of Christmas, I recall telling a fellow blogger that I was going to post a poem I wrote about the commercialism that has affected the holiday. I am quite late, 'tis a horrible habit. And it isn't really my best work, but I'll post it anyway.

*looks for notebook and remembers it's in backpack. *
*Remembers backpack is in new car outside*
*looks at time (11:03pm) and sighs*
*tells mom she's going outside for her backpack and journeys to the driveway.*
*figures she'll play it safe and just stick the key and unlock the car the old fashioned way. (Because she cannot see the buttons on the control)*
BEEP!!
BEEP!!
BEEP!!
BEEP!!
Oh my God! It's way too late for this!
*Franticly starts pushing buttons on control to make it stop*
Shut up, demented car!!
*after ages (it seemed) it finally complies*
*hears some of the neighbors waking up*
I am sooo sorry...
*searches for a way to open the trunk for a few minutes*
*creeps into the house after successfully locking the Car from Hell.*

Oh wow. I'm somewhat shaky after that.

Ok, sorry. Here is the poem that caused such a ruckus.

Corporate Christmas

It's Christmas time again
And it's time to spend
Children are filled with glee
But only large gifts will make them happy

Oh wait, I forgot.
Over Christmas we have fought
To be politically correct
"Winter Holiday" we must address.

We love our snow and mistletoe
But the manger scene we must not show
To make sure we do not offend
Our morals we must bend

Put up the light display
But keep God out of the way.
Santa is what we need
To satisfy our greed.

Gifts are all fine and good
But it must be understood
That presents symbolize one thing:
The gift of the newborn King.

I don't know about you
But I'm not ashamed of my saving Jew.
So as family gathers around
Let us remember what Christmas is really about.

-----

It actually turned out more preach-y than I had intended, but like the poem says, I'm not ashamed...so yeah.

*sighs as listening to Yahoo radio*

I thought Yahoo custom radio would be pretty awesome, and it was for a while, but it seems like now it mostly plays Christian music. Which is technically my fault, but yeah it's bugging me. I love Christian music, totally, but I also love a bunch of other music. That's why I thought making my own custom radio station would be cool, because it would have everything. At the beginning it did. It went from U2 to Eiffel65 to JoJo. It was very...original. And me. I was loving it to the extreme. But it seems like Yahoo have noticed I like Christian music and now it's like 90% of what I'm listening on Yahoo. If I wanted all Christian music I could just turn on the real radio, I'm not even kidding. I love VARIETY. Oh well, nothing's perfect.

Later.

I often read more blogs than I actually post. I've noticed a few of my habits when it comes to reading them. Often I look at a blog for a few seconds and can tell if I'd be interested or not.

1. If it has music, I'll most likely hang around, if not for the blog then for the music. Like right now I have some preteen's blog open because even though the quality of her blog is low, she has "She's a Rebel" by Green Day on her page. (The quality of her blog is actually rather high, she has her own template and stuff, but the actual writing is WrItTeN lIkE tHiS aNd It AnNoYs ThE hEcK oUt Of Me. Not the mention the typos.)

By now I've probably heard, "She's a Rebel" about ten times. And I'm not planning on stopping anytime soon.

*cracks knukles all at once*

I've been practicing to do that for a long time. (I have no life, ok?)

What was I talking about? Oh yeah, blogs.

2. If it has poetry, I will totally stop and read it, but if it doesn't grab and interest me in the first five lines or so, I will probably just go to the next blog. First impressions are usually right and if their poetry isn't good now, it probably wasn't good before.

3. If a blog has pictures, I will stop and look at them, however, most of the time I'm not really into personal pictures, being that I don't know the person and all. I love artistic photography and stuff, but my friends are really good at that, so I'm not easily impressed.

4. I pretty much skip sports pages.

5. Being that I speak English, I'm not really into foreign pages. There was this one really good photography page that was like from Denmark or something and I was pretty much enthralled. Sometimes I try to translate Spanish blogs, being that I take Spanish as a language, but most of the time I just skip over those too.

6. I've noticed that I tend to read political and enviromental pages which is pretty cool now that I think about it.

7. I like reading personal pages because they often have stories that well, feel real. Sometimes it feels too real and rather boring, but if it's important to them, then awesome.

8. There are a lot of mother bloggers, which is pretty inspiring and cool. I read a few and look at the pictures of their children they put up, but most of the time I don't become too involved, because if I did I would be way overwelmed. (There are LOTS of mothers and an average of two kids per mom. I would be tracking at least fifty kids by now. And I'm sorry, but I'd like to have a life. At least, a pathetic one that consists of overly cracking my knukles. ^_^)

9. If people don't use basic English rules, I usually skip the blog. i hate it when poeple make easy to fix typos and just laeve them and its even wosre when they dont use proper puctuation most of teh time and end up using to many explanation marks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (That sentence is a sample of what gets on my nerves. It's hard to act like a moron...but I do it so well.)

10. If a blog uses a lot of profanity I usually will leave because in my opinion, overly cussing shows a lack of vocabulary. Instead of calling someone a f-tard, call them a moron, idiot, scalywag, loser, deliquent. (I guess all that proves is that I'm a good name-caller...) Instead of saying you feel like a piece of crap (which I've seen many people say), say that you feel like Apollo carrying the world. Or that you feel like a piece of gum that has been scraped on multiple people's shoes. It's not that hard to think these things up people, a simple fourteen year old can do it easily.

So yep, there is my list. Hope you enjoy.

Isn't it scary what music can do to you?

I swear, I'm just listening randomly to online music and it's so weird.

The last song was a happy techno song and I was totally loving it.

Then this screamo song came on and I felt like crying.

Don't get me wrong: I love screamo. The lyrics were just so sad though.

But even though I'm sad I'm still enjoying the music. Isn't it strange?

I miss all my friends who went to a different high school. I miss all the friends I could have recieved by going to that school. (I guess that couldn't really be missing them though because I never met them...)

I chose to go to my school though. I have made new friends. But I feel...alone.

I swear, I'm bi-polar.

Alright, I'm not. But just a hour or so ago I was telling my friend that I'm glad I have emotions because feeling numb is lame.

Now I wish I was numb.

But you know what?

I'm ok with it.

Stuff happens right?

No, I'm lying. I'm not ok with feeling alone.

Have you ever been in a crowd and felt unknown even when people are talking to you?

The sad thing is...I don't even know what's bothering me.

It has nothing to do with Daniel. I do know that. He can go to the dance without me. I really don't mind. I hope he has fun. In fact, when I think of the whole situation, my mind clears.

Is that normal?

When I think about life though, that's where the problem is.

I feel...

Stuck.

Trapped.

Unloved.

Is that normal?

There is this person at school and I have no idea whether they are male or female. I'm not even kidding.

Could be a Male:
Nothing going on in the chest region
Doesn't wear makeup
Has a bony-like face.
I'm pretty sure I heard a teacher call them by a male name.

Could be a Female:
Long-ish hair.
I'm pretty sure I saw them in the girl's bathroom.

I feel so freaky thinking about it. Sorry about that.

I'm going insane.

I never thought I would be this crazy about a guy.

Shoot me now.

Then revive me.

I have homework to do.